Moby Bytes: Falling In Love with the Edges of People We Already Know...
Letter #8: A deep talk challenge for those who love vulnerability as much as I do... (and an invitation...)
(Where Are You? I’m Christina Rivera, debut author of MY OCEANS: Essays of Water, Whales, and Women and Moby Bytes is my series of newlettery notes deep-diving the oceanic kinship of bodies of water and beings. Thanks for signing up for this irregular email in your inbox!)
Do you remember that story that went viral about how people could fall in love if they looked each other in the eye and answered just 36 questions together? The gist: when people (even strangers) explore intimate questions together, they naturally fall in love.
Confession: I’ve been struggling with the fact that MY OCEANS is not the lightest or easiest material to read (with essays that tackle eco-grief, climate crisis, near-death moments, nightmares, abortion, extinction, feminine rage, toxins, assault, phobias, religious-patriarchy rebellion… and so on and on.)
But maybe I need to turn that narrative around?
What if we drop the romance-angle, but still engage with big questions to fall (more) in love with our friends, co-workers, neighbors, mom-circles, dad-groups, cousins, whatever—by intentionally holding some (safe) space for more open-minded reflection of the heavier and harder stuff? And maybe those conversations could make us fall more in love with each other?
That’s it. That’s my pitch for why I think you should consider gathering a small group of people (existing cohort or new) to read a few essays from My Oceans and have a discussion on big and existential ideas like: WHY ARE WE HERE ON THIS PLANET AT THIS MOMENT? *I don’t know why I’m shouting except I am in a bit of existential distress this week and prone to shouting... maybe you know the feeling?*
Oh yes, and I’d like to join your group.
Because I’m nosy, and I’m curious, and because I love vulnerability. Maybe you know this about me because you’ve worked with me during my sixteen-year career at Dragons in which fostering intimate dialogue was at the core of our programming. Maybe you’ve even sat in a circle where I facilitated such a discussion. Maybe you were in that one circle where a student stood up, pointed a finger at me (I was smiling too much), and shouted: “Wait! You LOVE seeing us vulnerable, don’t you?!”
It’s true. I do.
But I wouldn’t put you in any position I wouldn’t put myself. And publishing this profoundly IMPERFECT book is the most vulnerable thing I’ve ever done. So I’d love to join your book club (virtually, in April or May) to answer author Q&A and share in vulnerability together.
So that’s my invitation! For any interested, I added a page to my website inviting book clubs (and writing groups) to take up My Oceans as discussion fodder. My new bookmarks just arrived in the mail (!!) and the Humpback-moon eye makes me very happy peeking out from the top of my books and journals. I'm putting these bookmarks into the mail (with the whale-pun pencils, of course) for any groups who want them (while supplies last anyway)...
My new book club (& writing group) page also has sample discussion questions and a Calendy calendar via which groups can pick a date for a Zoom drop-in Q&A session. But if none of the dates work for you, just DM or email me and we’ll find a time. I’ve been meeting with some classes these last two weeks, and frankly, the flying sparks of engaged chatter are the highlights of my week (especially in these dark times).
And if you know someone else who has a reading/writing group or class who might be interested, please forward this email to them (maybe with this link to a sample essay/chapter from the book). Actually, let me just steal a line from a “chain letter” my kids received this week:
“Forward this message to 14 people in the next 10 minutes and tomorrow will be the best day of your life.” #facts
But really, thank you my subscribing-friends for supporting this journey in all the ways you already have.
I wish a thousand best days upon your life.
Sincerely,
Christina
*Last chance to* Pre-order Links!
Bookshop.org (every purchase supports independent bookstores & artists)
The Bookworm of Edwards (*pre-orders includes signed & stamped copies with a whale-pun pencil and a Humpback-eye-moon-selkie bookmark).
Creature Feature
Bringing back the “Creature Feature” section to this newsletter because, in these times, we need way more real stuff that’s so weird it breaks our understanding of what’s possible into pieces—like this rare and new footage of a deep-sea Humpback Anglerfish…
Where Are You?
If you’re new to Moby Bytes, I’m Christina Rivera and MY OCEANS: Essays of Water, Whales, and Women is my debut book of sea-linked essays deep-diving the oceanic kinship of bodies of water and beings. MY OCEANS is (soon!) forthcoming from Northwestern University Press/Curbstone Books in March of 2025, and is now available for pre-order at your favorite booksellers. Please share Moby Bytes with a friend who might want more pod in their life?
(Please) Pre-order MY OCEANS. It really helps build needed momentum. :)
Read some published essays & excerpts from MY OCEANS
Find me on your social platform of choice: Instagram, Threads, Facebook, TikTok, BlueSky, & LinkedIn
Visit my new author website: www.christinarivera.com
Hit the “like button” below to support this series of blue notes from my deep sea heart?
As someone who runs a climate/environment book club, I can count on one hand the number of authors I’ve seen who have prepared book club questions on their website. Yours is one of them. I dont have a ton of disposable income these days, so I mostly support indie authors by requesting their books at the LA Public Library (which I did for your book and strongly recommend all authors ask their supporters to do in case their followers can’t afford to buy books now).
However, something tells me we need your book in the world. So I will pre-order it. Best of luck with your release!
I strive to have the courage to share as vulnerably as you do.